Baby mama drama

Today, I reached the 15-week mark of pregnancy. I'm still throwing up just about every day, even though "they" say it should have stopped 3 weeks ago. I had a minor-to-medium scale meltdown this past weekend when I woke up feeling great, or so I thought... until I drank a homemade fruit smoothie that lasted in my stomach for approximately 5 minutes before returning back up and into the great depths of the toilet. I cried, and puked, and cried, and cried some more. I thought to myself that I didn't know how much longer I could take this. The sickness. The throwing up. The constant dizziness in my head. I sat and I sulked and I felt sorry for myself for a while.

... And then I looked down at my stomach, and I pictured our beautiful little baby swimming around inside – kicking and moving it's tiny little limbs, listening to my heart beat from inside. And I stopped feeling angry and reminded myself of this amazing blessing.

I think I needed that meltdown. I needed to remember how important it is that I am carrying a miracle with me every day. It's not just me anymore, nor will it ever be again. It's "us" – this little human, me, and Luke – our beautiful little family.

And even if I am sick this entire pregnancy (which I pray to God I'm not), I can and will do it with a happy heart and a smile on my face. Because I know that my sickness is because of our baby. Our creation. And in the end, the reward will be infinitely better than I can even imagine.

Baby Gill - 14 weeks

How far along?
14 weeks

Maternity clothes?
Just pants so far. WAY more comfortable than trying to button my old jeans/work pants over this growing bump!

Sleep:
Sleeping pretty good lately, with the occasional waking up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. Bed time has been early – usually no later than 10:00.

Best moment this week:
Yesterday, when I went an entire day without throwing up or even feeling queasy!

Miss Anything?
Being able to spring out of bed and be ready for the day. Morning sickness is the worst.

Movement:
Haven’t felt anything yet, but I’m hoping I will within these next few weeks!

Food cravings:
Grilled cheese, Cheez Its, cheddar cheese popcorn (noticing a trend here?) and recently, wheat bagels with strawberry cream CHEESE.

Anything making you queasy or sick:
Um, everything? Mainly the smell of cooking ground meat.

Gender prediction: 
We've been doing every silly trick imaginable. Chinese lunar years, the ring over the stomach/wrist trick, you name it. Starting to think it might be a boy in there!

Symptoms: 
Just about every pregnancy symptom known to (wo)man. Morning/all day sickness, foggy/dizzy feeling head, tired almost all the time, and of course my expanding belly!

Belly Button in or out? 
In, and I hope it stays that way. Although, I had an outie when I was little… so it’s probably going to pop when I get further along!

Wedding rings on or off? 
On!

Happy or Moody most of the time:
Happy. Even through the morning sickness (which makes me very moody), I know this will all be completely worth it in a little over 5 months when we meet our little babe!

Looking forward to: 
My bump starting to look more like a bump (and less like chub), not being sick anymore, our next ultrasound to find out if baby Gill is a boy or a girl!

{pregnancy prompt idea borrowed from Jessica at Little Baby Garvin}